Thursday, April 16, 2009

your point being?

song of the blog: ida maria - oh my god.

blog blog blog blog.....why did i start a blog? to put my thoughts down on 'paper'. simple enough. lets see.....thoughts....thoughts....thoughts...where are these....thoughts?

one thing i like to think about alot is if i could do anything i wanted, what would i do. id have a house, in the woods, away from everyone, well not everyone, i mean, just the general public. family could come, friends definitely, if i can make some here with common interests, and a partner, someone who shares the same mind set, someone who loves me for who i am, not who they think i am. i would spend my time creating music and art. a place where i could have time. just time to do the things that i wish to fill my life with. i could do those things now, i just lack the focus, the drive, the patience to do those things. but im going to use this newly gifted time to work on those 3 things. im going to focus on my goals.......what are these goals you ask?

-become a knowledgeable guitar player. i can play, but i want to play well. im trying to practice more, but i need to set aside a few hours each day to practice.

-become a skilled photographer. i feel i have a pretty good eye for things, aesthetically that is. ill make a post of some of my best pics, i feel. i dont want to do like wedding stuff, just visually pleasing photographs.

-become fit. i need to start working out. im not in terrible shape, i just want to be in better shape.

-become a calmer person, a less worrisome person. i want to be able to feel i can go anywhere and do anything. with that though, that just comes with jumping in. i think that this one is going to be the hardest. i dont want to be afraid to ask for what i want anymore.

i really need to work on my patience. im not sure how to do that, but i know i need to work on it. i dont mean standing in line at the bank or in traffic (unless im late for work or something). i just mean with life, with my goals. i expect to pick up the guitar and be the greatest ever, and get frustrated when i realize im not. i need to find this patience with in, to know in order to be the greatest i need to practice.

ive never really practiced at anything, except surfing. oh my, if i could live in asheville and still surf, i think id be a much happier person. i never got discouraged when i was surfing. i would go everyday after school, grab my board and head to the beach. in the entire 2 years or so i lived in florida, i never once stood up on my board, but i was still out there everyday i could go, paddling out and just doing it. i went on vacation to the outer banks the year before last and rented a long board one day and i finally did it. so...maybe i should use that has a template or a model to apply to other things in my life. with patience, hard work and time comes the ultimate reward, the satisfaction of knowing the work i put in was worth something, that i have something to show for it. be it just one day, and maybe 4 or 5 waves, those 2 years i put in help me do that.

i want to find a girl who loves to cook great food. i dont want to be Fry eating bachelor chow and drinking slurm with my robot friends. i want her to teach my tastebuds how to taste and taste well. i was talking to a guy i work with about training your taste buds to be able to determine what good food or good drink actually taste like. i mean, i love to eat, so a girl who loves to cook great food would be a great match i think.

thats about all for tonight.

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